I normally love my birthday. This year I am strugglung, though.
In 1998 my mother was having a really hard time. Her 36th birthday was coming up and 17 year old me decided to do something special for her. I worked at Chuck E. Cheese at the time and I got her a full birthday party package. Her friends came with their kids and we all played games and danced with Chuck E. and had a ball. Her presents that year from me, were a giant stuffed Chuck E. Cheese doll and a sapphire birthstone ring. Other than my car, that was tge most money I had ever spent. And it was so worth it. That ring was actually removed from her hand when she went to the hospital, before she passed.
Tomorrow I will be 36 and I have this strong urge to call her and reminisce about that fun day. But I fucking cant.
